Our bodies aren't just there to look nice. They're a vehicle to live, breathe, and to experience all that the world has to offer. So why, historically, have we shunned bodies just because they're different shapes, sizes, and of different functionalities? The 'one size fits all' approach to beauty standards has finally begun to wear thin over the past few years, with the body positivity movement making waves, and having impactful repercussions in the way people view themselves.
Finally, we're starting to see more people who feel happy and confident in the skin they're in. These women aren't wishing for bigger bums, or straighter hair, or smaller waists - and they don't want you to, either.
Leila Albesa
Who says you need to be thinner? Your message for the people who told you.
When I was younger, a lot of older relatives used to constantly tell me to lose weight. I have heard different versions of it since I was about 7 years old or maybe even younger. But as I grew older, I hear it less from the people around me. I got less unsolicited advices the more vocal I became with self-acceptance and self-love.
Now, I only hear comments about my weight from older adults, usually strangers. In fact, I had a fairly recent experience getting unsolicited remarks towards my body. This April, I went to a beach in Zambales with my friends. There was once an instance in this trip when our tour guide (an adult lady maybe in her early 40s) suddenly fixed my cropped halter top. While she was fixing it, she muttered “mag diet ka na kasi.” I replied with “ay ate, ‘di ko na kailangan mag diet, sexy na ako e.” It was an immediate response, just to let her know that her comment didn’t faze me. However, I was actually on a diet, not to change my appearance but to regulate my PCOS. I’m pretty okay with how I answered but I could’ve answered better. I can’t go back to that time but here’s a message to those people who like giving unsolicited advices on other people’s body:
Be kind. We don’t know whatever it is that other people are dealing with. We don’t know how much effort it takes for them to feel comfortable with the skin that they are in. I know in your head, you mean well. But it hurts more than it helps. Your words could either destroy or build one’s confidence, choose the latter.
What does my body allow me to do?
This question helps me a lot in accepting my body as it is. Whenever I feel like my body needs to look a certain way, I ask this question to myself.
My body allows me to breathe, live, and experience what life has to offer. Through my body, I am able to dance my troubles away. With my hands, I can paint my dreams and draw my emotions. With my fingers, I could pluck the guitar strings and create beautiful melodies. My mouth allows me to sing my feelings and turn my thoughts into music. My feet allows me to walk towards the people I love. And with my hands, I could embrace them. There are hundreds of things that my body let’s me do and I’m eternally grateful.
When I looked in the mirror, what's the first thought I had?
I have a love-hate relationship with mirrors. Sometimes, I love what I see so much that I can't stop looking at it. But there are also times when I just absolutely disgust its reflection.
Looking at the mirror is an act of self-reflection for me, literally and figuratively. When I look at it and see insecurities, I try so hard to remind myself that the mirror doesn't just reflect what I look like but also how I look at myself. If I dislike what it reflects, I just know that there is something within me that needs healing. I remind myself that it's not really what I see in the mirror that makes me feel bad, it's the negative words I remember, words that I used to think were true. The mirror reflects my hurt but I am definitely more than that.
And while I have this internal monologue in front of the mirror, slowly, I am starting to love my reflection again.
Message to someone who’s still in the process of loving himself/herself.
I am still in the process of loving myself so this message could also be for me.
You can still be your beautiful self while being a work in progress. You can work on your self and still love yourself in the process. It’s not going to be an easy journey. There will be moments of self-doubt and relapses but you’ll definitely overcome it. You’re already far from who you were. Once you decide that you want to be better for yourself, then you’ve already cleared half the battle. Be proud of it. Lastly, don’t forget to be kind to yourself. The person who deserves your kindness the most is yourself.
Tania Sevilla
Who says you need to be thinner? And your message for the people who told you.
The society told me so. I've experienced bullying since primary school, probably because I am not petite and I look ugly. For a teenage girl, I felt pressured by their standards, but what can I do? I have no knowledge about healthy food habits, working out, and anything about losing weight. It was hard. I remember myself crying because I never looked good in any outfit! During my college years, the pressure to be thinner consumed me. Trigger warning! I did crash diets, worked out excessively, became obsessed with calorie counting, and took laxatives. I know, a very desperate way to lose weight. Until now, I am working on myself not to get carried away from what others tell me how I should look. To those people, please never do it again to others, especially to the young generation. Instead of motivating them, you are carving insecurities among their bodies, which could lead to desperate measures to change their appearance based on the society's beauty standards!
What does my body allow me to do?
As the saying goes, "My body is my temple." I have so much to be grateful for my body. It gives me the ability to do things that I want, even the simplest to complex things! These days, I am getting in love with roller skating! I love how it requires full body coordination! I am learning how to fall without acquiring injuries, lean my body forward, use my arms to gain balance, bend my knees slightly, and move my body with the wheels. It's a fun activity. Realizing this, my body is a gift that allows me to do almost everything! The very reason why being one with our bodies must be our priority. A reminder that we must be kind to it despite its imperfections.
As the saying goes, "My body is my temple." I have so much to be grateful for my body. It gives me the ability to do things that I want, even the simplest to complex things! These days, I am getting in love with roller skating! I love how it requires full body coordination! I am learning how to fall without acquiring injuries, lean my body forward, use my arms to gain balance, bend my knees slightly, and move my body with the wheels. It's a fun activity. Realizing this, my body is a gift that allows me to do almost everything! The very reason why being one with our bodies must be our priority. A reminder that we must be kind to it despite its imperfections.
When I looked in the mirror, what's the first thought I had?
Whenever I look at myself in the mirror, the first thing I have in mind is "I look fat." Due to my body insecurities and being used to looking fat, I would still think of my body as how it used to be. Just to share, I lost 17kg from last year! From a 65kg girl with a 153 cm height, I am now down to 48kg! I can now wear clothes that shows a little bit of skin and makes me confident. However, there are times when I still feel fat. It seems like I am stuck in a huge body, even though people around me would tell how petite I look right now. Silly, I know.
Message for people who’s still in the process of loving themselves.
Whenever I look at myself in the mirror, the first thing I have in mind is "I look fat." Due to my body insecurities and being used to looking fat, I would still think of my body as how it used to be. Just to share, I lost 17kg from last year! From a 65kg girl with a 153 cm height, I am now down to 48kg! I can now wear clothes that shows a little bit of skin and makes me confident. However, there are times when I still feel fat. It seems like I am stuck in a huge body, even though people around me would tell how petite I look right now. Silly, I know.
Message for people who’s still in the process of loving themselves.
The process of accepting our bodies' imperfections is a long battle. It is never an easy ride, I must say. As for me, it took me years of realizing the importance of my body and ignoring others' opinions. Honestly, I am still in the process of loving my body. It is an every day battle. However, each day, I would compliment one thing about me to lift my mood. I would say, "My waist looks slimmer today." "My thighs look sexy!" "My bum looks bigger on my fit!" — things like these. Doing so would make me feel positive about how I look. A message to our lovelies out there, our bodies are carved with stretch marks, cellulites, acne scars, hairs, uneven complexion, tummy rolls, thick thighs, and flabby arms. Do these things make us a little less human? Never! We must recognize the subjectivity of what beauty means – from one another. Beauty comes in different forms. Every reference of representations, the differences between colors, sizes, and shapes are beautiful. At the end of the day, beauty is more pleasing when it comes with a purpose, much like how it must be anchored with intelligence and principles. Our looks vary and will be wary in time, but what matters the most is the heart remains gold.
Marinette Fernandez
Who says you need to be thinner? And your message for the people who told you.
I can’t remember when and who are the people who made a comment that I should lose weight. For me, those people who likes to critics someone’s body are shallow and insecure with their own we all have our differences. Different body type, different skin type and that what makes us who we are and unique.
What does my body allow me to do?
Be myself.
When I looked in the mirror, what's the first thought I had?
When I looked in the mirror, what's the first thought I had?
Whenever I look at myself in the mirror I always feel mix emotions. I feel insecure, bothered and disappointed but at the same time I get to accept who I am. I get to accept that I am beautiful just the way I am. All I need to do is to love myself and take good care of me—inside and out.
Message for people who’s still in the process of loving themselves.
It will take time for you to able truly love yourself but trust the process and have patience. Once you have learned to love who you are, everything will follow, peace of mind and genuine happiness.